Mar. 30th, 2004 11:56 pm
almost_russell: (Default)
[personal profile] almost_russell
On his way back from seeing Arwen at Buffy's, Russell called in to see Agent Smith. Winding him up always gave him a buzz! On his way out, [ profile] code_smith handed him a piece of paper with questions on it.

1) Why do you enjoy killing your brain cells with mind-altering substances? Is it because your brain cells are a non-essential part of your being?

See, I read this article in Omni, which said that we all have over 100 billion brain cells, and we only ever use 10% of them, so I reckon that there's plenty left over to play with! And I love the buzz, man! In fact, why don't you make up a batch of that synthetic dope, grab a copy of the "Smoke and Mirrors" program, and come on over! Then you can see for yourself. My door is always open to anyone who wants to expand their mind ... and kill a few brain cells! *grins* Course, not in your case, man. No brain!

2) Drugs or your guitar. Which one would you choose? You can't say both.

Easy. Guitar! And I don't care if you don't believe me!

3) What is 1 + 1?

Oooh, hard one, Smith! Lets go with ah ... 2!

4) What about 8 modulo 6?

Ah, easy! 2! Given that 2 is the remainder of 8 divided by 6. Ah ha! Proof that I've still got some live ones in there somewhere!

5) You're stoned and not paying attention to me, aren't you, Russell?

Did you say something, man? *grins* Actually, I'm not, but the more time I spend with you, the more I wish I was!

Date: 2004-03-30 03:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
See, I read this article in Omni, which said that we all have over 100 billion brain cells, and we only ever use 10% of them, so I reckon that there's plenty left over to play with!

*shakes head* Humans. So horribly inefficient. And how exactly do you know that you're not destroying the 10% of the brain cells you're currently using, anyway? The other 90% may very well remain unharmed as you assault the only 10% you are actually capable of using. Not very smart, Russell.

Date: 2004-03-31 01:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Well, according to the law of averages ... or maybe that was chaos theory ... according to some mathematical law, it's more likely that I'll be killing off the ones I don't use. So I'm cool with that. And maybe these mind expanding drugs actually grow new ones!

Date: 2004-03-31 11:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
New defective ones, you mean?

Date: 2004-03-31 11:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
*ignores snarky comment* Speaking of defective, how did your rescue go, man? Neo in one piece is he? *grins smugly*

Date: 2004-03-31 11:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Not only that, but improved! *grins evilly*

Date: 2004-03-31 11:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
So regressing him to a toddler actually counts as a success in your books?? Is it any wonder I have no faith in your plans?

Date: 2004-03-31 11:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Let's analyze this result, shall we?

1) Adult Neo. IQ of 0 (and that's being kind to him). Clumsy and capable of causing great destruction. Irritates me to no end. Makes Trinity happy.

2) Toddler Neo. IQ of 0. Irritates me to no end. Still capable of causing great destruction. Upside: Irritates Trinity as well.

Date: 2004-03-31 12:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
So, you're classing this as a success all because Trinity is irritated? You have one sick sense of humour, man!

Date: 2004-03-31 12:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Come on. Tell me she isn't the funniest thing alive when she has that pissed off look on her face? *laughs*

Date: 2004-03-31 12:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
*backs off a little* Don't know about that, man, but you're one of the scariest things .. er .. not alive, when you laugh!

Date: 2004-03-31 12:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Really? *smiles with an evil gleam in his eye* How kind of you to notice.

Date: 2004-03-31 12:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
*smiles while deciding which would be the quickest way out, should he need to leave in a hurry*

But, er, isn't laughter bordering on emotion, man? I thought you didn't do emotion!

Date: 2004-03-31 12:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I don't. My laughter is triggered by preset conditions as determined by my algorithms. It has nothing to do with emotions.

And actually, from what I've observed of humans, the more emotional a person is, the less they tend to laugh.

Date: 2004-03-31 12:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh, algorithms, of course! But I would say I was a pretty emotional person, and I laugh a lot. You can't generalise like that when it comes to people, man!

Date: 2004-03-31 12:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Considering all the drugs you do, I think it's safe to say your mind is an anomaly in terms of how it works. Or rather, doesn't work.

Date: 2004-03-31 12:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hey, man, my mind works just fine! Did you come see me for any reason, or just to make with the snarky comments?

Date: 2004-03-31 12:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
As always, I'm only here for the snarky comments, of course.

Date: 2004-03-31 12:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Fine, as long as I know! *opens a cold beer, and takes a long drink*


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